Old Man Wonder
by RoxyJaws
Summary: It's the middle of the night and Alfred confiscated Dick Grayson's utility belt. When Batman calls for backup, Alfred, not wanting to wake up the child, takes it upon himself to help. Needless to say, Bruce is in for a shocking surprise. He did not expect to see an elderly Robin. Oneshot (Dick Grayson as Robin)


**I wrote this FOREVER ago while in a Robin phase! I stumbled upon it this week, I'd forgotten that I wrote this.**

 **I don't really read comics, but this story is general enough so... if there's anything that seems iffy to someone who really knows Batman and Robin, then sorry. This is just meant to be funny. (Dick Grayson is Robin in this story. Not Nightwing. I couldn't choose "Richard G./Robin". This story would probably work with any Robin, but Dick is the only one that I really know.)  
**

 **Anyway, the reason that I didn't post this earlier is that I was waiting for my sister to do a good cover photo, but I'm done waiting on that. The cover photo is the sketch she made that inspired this story.**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Batman**

* * *

One night, like many others, a lone bird was patrolling the streets of Gotham. It was 6 o'clock and it wasn't unusual for Robin to be out by himself at this time. Dick Grayson had finished school at 4:30 and was done with his homework by 5 o'clock. Afterwards, he got bored, so he had his dinner early –as he often does– and went out to protect to city as Robin. Batman judged that Robin had enough experience to be able to take care of himself on his own, as long as it wasn't too late into the night, so it was fine for Robin to be out at 6 o'clock.

After a few hours of catching criminals and hanging out on rooftops, Robin heard a woosh sound. "I think I heard a woosh." He turned around to find his mentor emerge from the shadows. Looks like Bruce Wayne had _finaly_ passed through all his boring paperwork and had diner. He was now Batman. Robin looked at his watch that showed 20:14. "Took you long enough, now we'll barely have any time together before you send me home!" the Boy Wonder complained.

"We better get moving then" Batman replied, as he took out his grappling hook and leapt to the other building. Robin did the same. After that, they did the same thing Robin had been doing before, only there wasn't a whole lot of hanging out doing nothing, since as it grew dark, more and more bad guys came out of their hiding places. The later it was, the tougher the criminals seemed to be, which is why Batman was opposed to letting Robin out too late, or on his own too long.

Eventually, Batman noticed that Robin seemed to be worn out from the fighting. He turned to his ward and said "Robin, it's late." He didn't have to say it; Robin knew he meant it was time for him to go home.

"But Batman! I'm not even tired!" Robin said, trying his best to hide that he's lying.

"You've been at it for more than four hours."

"So? You've done way more before! And so have I!"

"It's a school night and way past your bedtime. This is not up for discussion. Now go home and don't take any detours." With another woosh, Batman was back in the shadows. Robin went straight home since he knew that Batman would know if he _did_ stick around, somehow. He always knows.

When Robin got home, he changed back into Dick Grayson and went to bed. However, instead of going to sleep, he started listening to police scanners, looking for any sing of Batman and ready to get back out there at the first sign of trouble. It didn't take five minutes, though, until Alfred appeared at the door.

"Good to see you home and well Master Richard. However I do believe you're supposed to be asleep at this time" Alfred said as he took away Dick's utility belt which he had been using.

"Come on Alfred! How am I supposed to sleep if Bruce might need me?" Dick said, reaching out for his equipment.

"Master Bruce is fully capable of patrolling by himself as he has done long before he met you"

"But what if-"

"No buts Master Richard, you have school tomorrow and you need your sleep" Alfred said sternly.

Dick sighed "Fine. Could you wake me up if Batman is in a tough spot? Please"

Knowing this would allow the boy to finally get to sleep, Alfred said "Very well. Now get some sleep"

The old butler left the room and Dick reluctantly went to sleep. How in heavens would he know if Batman were in trouble anyway? The Batman doesn't call home when he's being ambushed.

After he was done with all the cleaning he had to do or anything that could keep him busy, Alfred finally decided to just take a nap in the batcave while waiting for Bruce to return. He knew he didn't have to, but he occasionaly waited up for him to make sure he got home. That night, Alfred was also in the batcave to keep an eye on Dick's bedroom door and window with the security cameras installed in the corridor and outside. Just to make sure he didn't try to sneak off. After an hour of keeping guard, though, it was obvious that Dick was asleep or that if he did try to leave, he'd be able to put the cameras on a loop from his laptop computer and _then_ sneak out. In both cases, staying up to look was pointless. With that in mind, Alfred nodded off.

Alfred awoke to the sound of something beeping. He checked the time and saw that it was 1:57 am. "Who would be calling at this ungodly hour" Alfred asked. He soon realized that it wasn't a phone that was ringing, but Robin's utility belt. He took the beeping device from one of the belt's compartments and saw that it showed a map of Gotham on a screen with a flashing red dot at what appeared to be the East end of the city. It didn't take long for Alfred to deduce what this was. Batman was sending out a distress signal and he needed Robin.

The old butler didn't know if he should be angry or worried. He didn't think Bruce would _actually_ send out an S.O.S. He's never relied on anyone else in the field –except with the Justice League, but that's different. If Dick always has his utility belt in his room at night with this thing in it, it must mean they use it a lot, right? Now Alfred wasn't angry that Bruce decided to count on someone to have his back, that part was a relief. Alfred was angry that he'd wake up the poor child at nearly two in the morning to go back in the face of danger!

Bruce might wake up Dick in the middle of the night, but Alfred would not. Yes, he had told him he'd wake him if Batman found himself in a tough spot, but he hadn't meant it! He didn't realize he had to! So he wouldn't wake Dick up on a school night at two in the morning and that's that. A problem still remained, however: Batman was in trouble. He sent out for Robin and expected to get his help soon. It's not called a distress signal for nothing!

Batman needed Robin and Dick was out of commission at this time, as far as Alfred was concerned. So that left only one option. Without thinking twice, the butler rushed to the wardrobe and thanked God the material to Robin's costume was stretchy.

In the East of Gotham

Batman had seen a gang of drug dealers. It seemed simple at first, but as soon as the fighting started, the cavalry arrived and Batman realized that he might have bitten off more than he could chew. He hated doing this to Dick, waking him up in the middle of the night because of his own recklessness, but there was no backing out now. He knew that Dick wouldn't mind if it meant they all get to come home in one piece and Alfred never needed to know. The boy's a natural at sneaking out.

So Batman sent out a distress signal and kept fighting. Honestly, he didn't think he could take everyone here down, even _with_ Robin's help. He was hoping the boy could serve as a diversion then they could both disappear and go after these guys another day. Batman had already placed a tracker on whom he believed to be the gang's leader as well as on four other thugs.

A few minutes after the signal was sent, Batman was meet with one of the most disturbing sights he'd ever seen. The thugs also ceased their fighting at this sight.

If Batman wanted a diversion, he couldn't have wished for a better one, for there, standing with a perfect posture, was Robin. A very old Robin. If the Robin everyone knows is known as 'Boy Wonder', then this would be 'Old Man Wonder'. The man Bruce knows as Alfred was wearing Robin's outfit. Thank God it was a stretchy material, because the shorts could have proven a disaster. Instead of the boots, though, he wore his own clean shoes as well as the socks with suspenders. The hairy legs didn't add charm either. As for the top, he still had a bow tie and he looked as though he were bringing a dinner plate, only instead of a plate, he was holding a birdarang with his pinkie in the air. It was quite a sight.

Batman snapped out of it before the rest of the thugs and threw a smoke pellet on the ground seconds before disappearing. He appeared next to the old Robin and they both ran to find a safe place to talk. Batman glared at Robin. "Well... Robin." He forced the name out "You look different" the bat said sarcastically. "I assume you didn't grapple all the way here" At least, he hoped not; that was an image he could live without.

Old Man Wonder answered "The Batmobile is parked in an alley nearby Master B-" Batman sent him a bat-glare "Batman" No questions asked, this situation was weird for everyone.

"We'll talk in the car" Batman said bluntly. An awkward silence accompanied them as they made their way to the Batmobile. Once they got there, Batman and 'Robin' both reached for the driver side door at the same time. They shared a look and a glare and without a word, Batman got in the driver seat and Robin, in the passenger seat.

Batman started the car and they left in the direction of the batcave. "Why are you here?" The Bat asked.

"Did you not send out a distress signal?" the old man wonder answered with a question.

"I did. I sent a distress signal to _Robin_. So why are _you_ here." Batman reformulated his original question.

" _I_ am here because I took the utility belt from young Master Robin when he wouldn't go to sleep. I'm the one who received your signal and I must say I am disappointed in you for trying to make him wake up and fight at 2 O'Clock in the morning" Old Robin scolded.

"You think I planned this? I was ambushed, I needed back up" Batman defended.

"In that case, perhaps you should know when to go home rather than take such risks in the middle of the night" the substitute Robin retaliated.

"So I'm supposed to just abandon my duties to this city and let criminals roam free? Is that what you're saying?" Batman asked rhetorically.

"Not at all, Master Batman, I am simply stating that you should stop being so reckless when your safety net is getting some much needed rest and not to be disturbed!" Old man wonder concluded.

Batman didn't know how to answer that. He sighed and said "You're right about that. But sometimes there's nothing else I can do"

When they finally arrived at the Batcave, Alfred rushed into a changing room to take off the tight uniform and put on his regular, normal sized clothes. When he went out, Bruce was there waiting. He said one thing before turning around and going into the manor.

"We never speak of this"

Indeed, they never spoke of what transpired that night in Eastern Gotham. Dick Grayson never knew that Alfred had borrowed his uniform. The only evidence of what happened was that Batman became more cautious at night and hardly ever needed to wake up his ward anymore.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading!**

 **~RoxyJaws~**


End file.
